The Gargoyle

I've lived 1/3 of my life (if I'm lucky). I try not to think about how long I might live or how tenuous our grasp on existing sometimes proves to be, but one of the books I'm reading made me start pondering this again.

Last night, as I lay in bed, trying to tuck in a few more pages before I put the light out, I got to a section in my book that shook me. The character in my story, whom I don't really love or hate at this point, was in car crash (because of his hallucinations due to drugs and alcohol) and was burned very badly. He is found and taken to the hospital and there he is in the burn ward, with too much time on his hands and all-too painful procedures to endure.

So, he decides that all he is doing is playing along with the doctors, pretending that he cares about healing. While in reality what he's really doing is acting until he's well enough to be released, at which point he plans on killing himself. It's very early in the book, so I have to imagine that he doesn't end up doing that...besides there is an interesting plot development that I see coming.

But something that the character thinks about his currently planned impending doom got me thinking. I don't know if there is an afterlife, but one day, I'll get to find out. And that, more than anything else, terrifies me. Not enough to make me pretend that I believe in some imaginary afterlife to make myself feel better, but more than anything else I can think of.

First Attempt at Running

I guess this is the second thing I've done this year that "scared" me. (The first was going on another internet date.)

My friend and I tried to run on the treadmills at the gym. I know, it sounds silly to be scared of running, but I was. I get worried that people will see somehow that I'm not a runner (and perhaps tell me what I'm doing wrong). I also worry that I'll be SO out of shape that my helpless panting will scare people into calling emergency medical personnel.

When it came down to it, I walked for 10 minutes, ran for 4 and a half minutes, walked for 5 more minutes, ran for 5 minutes and then walked for another 13 minutes. Total time was 37 minutes and I felt good when I stopped. I was sweaty and felt that good kind of tired. I am going to do this some more!!

This makes me feel better about adding the slight twist to my #1 New Year's resolution. Instead of simply not letting fear stop me from doing things, I want to do things that scare me. So I can train my brain and my body that it will be okay. Once my brain and body are retrained, I think I'll be able to face so many more scary challenges.

On one hand it sounds frightening, but I'm also so looking forward to some new found freedom.

Time for a new calendar

Many times, especially now that I'm working, I don't care about having a regular wall calendar. But this year, I feel that I have enough going on that I'll need to be able to visually plan it all out.

I feel like I'm looking forward to certain things so much that I'm missing on living in the moment. Because what else do we really have in life but right now?

But even though I do believe that, I think that it's also important to have things to look forward to. I have asked some of my friends if they made New Year's resolutions, but once decided to ask someone, "What are you looking forward to this year?"

The answer surprised me. They didn't really know what they were looking forward to. Hmm. Huh. I don't get get it...? Seems like if you're not looking forward to anything it might mean that you don't have hopes or dreams. How could that be?

Random Thoughts

Thank you, Stephenie Meyer, for giving me a happy ending. Now I can always imagine that I'm Bella and I have my Edward.

Fifty degrees tomorrow - ahhh, something to look forward to.

I want to have good dreams tonight. Dreams of hot weather on sandy beaches, a king sized bed and a big, strong man...knowing what occupation would be fulfilling.

Off to bed.

View from my window

Here is the view from my window this morning.

First Date of 2009

Tonight I went out on my first date of the new year. I met T online, by responding to his personal ad on Craigslist.

We went out for a cup of coffee. It was very interesting. He is about 1 inch shorter than me, and probably weighs less than me. He was friendly, but nervous and self conscious. I felt a little bad for him there, because for whatever reason, I felt very comfortable most of the time.

He is about my age but has lived a completely different life than me. He is a recovering alcoholic and has been sober for about 3 years. He also quit smoking recently.

He was a little quirky, kind of a thinker, and definitely different than I was expecting. I learned on my first date from the computer (last year), that the best thing to do is not decide or tell each other if you want to see each other again. I think that you should wait until you go home, think about it, feel it out and see what your gut says.

I don't know if I would be romantically interested in T or not, but at least I know that I would be comfortable hanging out again. We'll see what he thinks. You never can tell.

New Year's Resolutions

Boy, there is a part of me that hates making resolutions. Maybe it's the simple fact that I've written some resolutions in the past and haven't necessarily followed through with them.

It's embarrassing to say the least, but I guess that I shouldn't let that stop me from trying again. Which brings me to my first resolution.

1. I will not let fear control my choices. (This one is an all encompassing subject. I could actually just leave the list at this one and feel like my bases are mostly covered.)

2. I will not avoid doing things out of laziness.

3. I will be open to change.

My list was actually a lot longer when I started writing them down this morning, but then as I typed, I realized that these 3 are all I need. I often wonder what it was in my younger life that made me who I am today.

I find that I sometimes think and rethink things and hesitate to take action because of fear. I become afraid of losing what I have, of looking stupid, of stepping outside my comfort zone. And I hate it.

One way or another, I am going to find a way to change my life. Now.

Somehow, "cold" just doesn't say enough

Last night, at around 2:30am, the temperature in Denver was -19. Yes, that is correct, negative 19. When I left for work, it was -9. The high today was in the teens, until you factored in the wind chill, of course.

Holy crap, I never thought I could be so cold!!

I'm driving a new (to me) car, courtesy of my sister. It's so much better than my old car, but even this car couldn't get warm enough to melt the ice off the back windshield. The defroster was running, but heck, it's only a machine!

On Saturday, I baked a bunch (all day) with my neighbor. One of my friends came over and delivered a tree that she was giving me. I felt so special that she shared a tree with me, because it came from her yard and was one of about 10 that her dad had planted years ago. Her father passed away quite a while back (years), so it was a truly special gift.

I recently read the first two books in the Twilight series and loved them. I know I'm late to the game in reading these, but I'm glad I'm late. Here's why. I get to read a bunch of books in a row and don't have to wait! The second book I read in 2 evenings. I am on the waitlist at the library for the 3rd.

You might like these books if you love the feeling of being SO in love, like you'll just die if you can't have that person. It's very 15-years-old, but I just DON'T CARE! It's fun to have something young and fun to get me excited.

This Christmas, I'm really only shopping for my son. I decided early that I didn't want to exchange gifts with other people. Mostly because I just don't want to spend all the money and time. I'd rather visit with people and let them relax instead of trying to find some knick knack that I won't want to dust. It's funny how things change as you get older and start accumulating all the stuff you want.

My 'baby' turned 9 years old last week. Wow. It won't be long now. I'll blink and I'll be turning 40 and he'll be turning 18! I guess that's the way it goes. I better try to have more fun, and fast!

I'm looking forward to time off, but really just wish that my son and I both had the flu so we could skip school and work and stay home and cuddle up. Oh well, I better be careful what I wish for!

Buttery Soft Crescent Rolls

Since my friend gave me a bread machine, I've been looking for and trying new recipes that use it. Many of the times when I've searched online, people say that they like to use the machine to make their dough, and then bake in their regular oven.

I started thinking about it and realized that this is a great idea. Mostly because my kitchen usually isn't warm enough in winter for dough to rise. And the other great thing, is that you can make all sorts of bread items, not just loaves of bread.

I found this recipe on Recipezaar...and my 8 year old son gives them 4 out of 5 stars. It was very simple and the rolls really get large when you bake them. They fluff up and have a nice buttery taste.

Buttery Soft Crescent Rolls

1/2 c. warm water
1/2 c. warm milk
1 egg
1/3 c. butter (softened)
1/3 c. white sugar
1 tsp. salt
3 3/4 c. all purpose flour
1 pkg (1/4 oz.) active dry yeast...about 2 1/4 teaspoons
1/4 c. butter (melted)

1. Place ingredients into bread maker in order recommended by manufacturer: water, milk, egg, 1/3 cup butter, sugar, salt, flour and yeast. Reserve additional butter butter (1/4 cup) for later.

2. Select dough/knead cycle and start. This cycle should mix dough and allow it to rise for 1 hour.

3. Turn dough out onto a floured surface and roll into a circle, about 1/4 inch thick. Brush with additional butter.

4. Cut into 16 pie shaped wedges. Roll wedges starting with wide end into crescent shapes.

5. Place on an ungreased baking sheet and allow to rise for an additional hour.

6. Bake for 10- 15 minutes at 375°F or until golden brown.

Making pasta using what's at hand...

I need to go grocery shopping. Really badly. You can tell when you open my refrigerator and see the back of it! So, when it was time to make dinner last night, I had to figure out something new.

I started with thin spaghetti, and the thought of olive oil and garlic. Then, I remembered that I had some spinach that needed to be eaten. It all took off from there.

Pasta with Garlic Spinach Cream Cheese Sauce

Boil your pasta in salted water till al dente.

Meanwhile, use about 1-2 tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil and saute your fresh spinach. I used about 3-4 cups (it really wilts down to nothing). When the spinach is almost all wilted, add in 1-2 cloves of chopped garlic. Add a half cup of chicken broth. Simmer, reducing by about half the liquid. Add in about 1/3 block of cream cheese. Stir until melted. Toss hot pasta in sauce. Serve!

Took a little advice and made something good...

I took Ilva's advice and made something yummy for myself last weekend. I haven't been doing too much real cooking or baking lately, but my son perked up when I suggested that maybe we should bake a pie.

I used a couple of recipes from America's Test Kitchen...their all butter pastry for the crust and their recipe for Deep Dish Apple Pie. It turned out well, and I even liked it better cold!

All-Butter Pie Pastry

2 1/2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour (12 1/2 ounces), plus additional flour for work surface
1 teaspoon table salt
1 tablespoon sugar
16 tablespoons unsalted butter (2 sticks), cold, cut into 1/2-inch cubes and frozen for 10 minutes
3 tablespoons sour cream
1/3 cup ice water , or more if needed

1. For Pastry: Process flour, salt, and sugar together in food processor until combined, about 3 seconds. Add butter and pulse until butter is size of large peas, about ten 1-second pulses.

2. Using fork, mix sour cream and 1/3 cup ice water in small bowl until combined. Add half of sour cream mixture to flour mixture; pulse for three 1-second pulses. Repeat with remaining sour cream mixture. Pinch dough with fingers; if dough is floury, dry, and does not hold together, add 1 to 2 tablespoons ice water and process until dough forms large clumps and no dry flour remains, three to five 1-second pulses.

3. Turn dough out onto work surface. Divide dough into 2 balls and flatten each into 4-inch disk; wrap each disk in plastic and refrigerate until firm but not hard, 1 to 2 hours, before rolling. (Dough can be refrigerated for up to 24 hours. Let thoroughly chilled dough stand at room temperature for 15 minutes before rolling.)

Deep Dish Apple Pie

Use a combination of tart and sweet apples for this pie. Good choices for tart are Granny Smiths,
Empires, or Cortlands; for sweet, we recommend Golden Delicious, Jonagolds, or Braeburns.
Wrap leftovers tightly in plastic wrap and store at room temperature for up to 24 hours. To reheat, remove the wrap and warm the pie in a 350-degree oven for 15 to 20 minutes.

1⁄2 cup (31⁄2 ounces) plus 1 teaspoon granulated sugar
1⁄4 cup (13⁄4 ounces) packed light brown sugar
1⁄4 teaspoon table salt
1 tablespoon juice and 1⁄2 teaspoon grated zest from 1 lemon
1⁄8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
21⁄2 pounds firm tart apples (about 5 medium), peeled and cut into 1⁄4-inch-thick slices (see note)
21⁄2 pounds firm sweet apples (about 5 medium), peeled and cut into 1⁄4-inch-thick slices (see note)
1 recipe Foolproof All-Butter Pie Pastry
1 egg white, beaten lightly

1. Mix 1⁄2 cup granulated sugar, brown sugar, salt, zest, and cinnamon in large bowl; add apples
and toss to combine. Transfer apples to Dutch oven (do not wash bowl) and cook, covered, over
medium heat, stirring frequently, until apples are tender when poked with fork but still hold
their shape, 15 to 20 minutes. (Apples and juices should gently simmer during cooking.) Transfer
apples and juices to rimmed baking sheet and cool to room temperature, about 30 minutes. While apples cool, adjust oven rack to lowest position, place empty rimmed baking sheet on rack, and heat oven to 425 degrees.

2. Remove 1 disk of dough from refrigerator and roll out between 2 large sheets of parchment
paper or plastic wrap to 12-inch circle, about 1⁄8 inch thick. (If dough becomes soft and/or sticky,
return to refrigerator until firm.) Remove parchment from one side of dough and flip onto 9-
inch pie plate; peel off second layer of parchment. Working around circumference, ease dough into plate by gently lifting edge of dough with one hand while pressing into plate bottom with other hand. Leave dough that overhangs plate in place; refrigerate until dough is firm, about 30 minutes.

3. Meanwhile, roll second disk of dough between 2 large sheets of parchment paper or
plastic wrap to 12-inch circle, about 1⁄8 inch thick. Refrigerate, leaving dough between parchment
sheets, until firm, about 30 minutes.

4. Set large colander over now-empty bowl; transfer cooled apples to colander. Shake colander
to drain off as much juice as possible (cooked apples should measure about 8 cups); discard
juice. Transfer apples to dough-lined pie plate; sprinkle with lemon juice.

5. Remove parchment from one side of remaining dough and flip dough onto apples; peel off
second piece of parchment. Pinch edges of top and bottom dough rounds firmly together. Following illustrations 1 through 4, trim and seal edges of dough, then cut four 2-inch slits in top of dough. Brush surface with beaten egg white and sprinkle evenly with remaining teaspoon sugar.

6. Set pie on preheated baking sheet; bake until crust is dark golden brown, 45 to 55 minutes.
Transfer pie to wire rack and cool at least 11⁄2 hours. Cut into wedges and serve.

Time flies...

I guess that I must have been busy the last 2 months!

I have been thinking about so many things lately.

I went out on a few dates with a guy. They were fun, but it just didn't feel right. However, it did remind me that I want and need some sort of connection with a guy. Now, to find the right guy. And soon, I hope. The memories of the few kisses we shared makes me start daydreaming at work.

My car has been having issues off and on (yeck), and right now my muffler is hanging about 6 inches from the ground. I know this isn't good, but I think it is too rusted and old to be reattached, so if I take it in, they'll be selling me a new muffler. So, I haven't taken it in. This is on top of two front tires that keep losing air (and two flat tires about a month ago). Damn car.

My work has been pretty stressful as well. I am SO busy, too. Maybe I'll get lucky and next week will be slower.

A couple I know is having serious relationship problems and I feel like I'm stuck in the middle. It's been more stressful than dealing with my own divorce.

I've been staying quiet around my friends because I'm just feeling a little stressed out and down lately. I wonder if it has to do with the arrival of the first cold days of autumn.

Well, this is kind of a blue note to finish on, but I guess that is appropriate.

Stuffed Tomatoes

I will admit that I've never really thought that stuffed tomatoes looked very appetizing. But lately, I've been trying to eat better and that mostly means eating more veggies and fewer carbs (I LOVE carbs!).

My friend Mike at work brought me in several tomatoes and a fresh peach from his garden. I ate the peach at lunch - it was perfect. I brought the 3 tomatoes home, not knowing what I'd do with them. I've never been a huge tomato fan, but I've been enjoying them more as I've gotten older.

With my limited supplies (grocery shopping tomorrow is a must), I decided to make baked, stuffed tomatoes. From what I could tell by looking at other recipes online, stuffed tomatoes can contain anything you want. I saw some with ground beef, but I was looking for something simpler.

I used a 7 grain rice blend, crushed red pepper, basil, fresh garlic and cheese.

They were juicy, flavorful and filling. A vegetarian dinner that was delicious and satisfying.

Say what you want about me, but don't mess with my grill.

The homeowners' association sent me a letter this weekend. Telling me to remove my grill from the property.

I'm pretty sure they're in the wrong, and cannot require me to remove the grill, but can make me remove the propane tanks (fine, I understand). And I am removing them.

But the thing that pisses me off is that I am pretty sure the HOA is retaliating against me for writing a letter for a neighbor. This particular neighbor is a disabled American and she needs to try to regain some of her small motor skills. One thing her doctor suggested was to garden. So, she had a little garden when I moved in last year. One day, she comes and tells me that she had to remove it all because the HOA sent her a letter stating that she couldn't have it. The garden was pretty cute, too.

So, the local office for disabled Americans told her that the HOA was violating her rights and interfering with treatment prescribed by her physician. So, the HOA lady (it's just one lady out to get people) finally relents and tells her she can put her plant stand back out front if it's okay with her neighbor...hence my letter. BUT then, after she sends my letter, she's told that she can't put any plants on it.

And about 2 months later, I get a notice about my grill. Mind you, I'm on the second floor and you can hardly see my grill. And, other people on the first floor have grills sitting on their patios. Ugh. I hate it when someone has no life and has to go about making others as miserable as possible.

Bee-otch.

Now, I'm waiting on my local fire department to get back to me so that I can confirm I'm in the right and send a written response. And, I think I'm going to have to start telling ALL of my neighbors about her tactics. I heard a rumor that another neighbor actually DID get rid of her grill when the HOA told her she had to. If I can help it, that will be the last person to make that mistake!

Mr. Men and Little Miss

I love it when something you loved as a child (but has since disappeared) reappears. I could never remember what these guys were called, but when I was younger, I colored in Mr. Men Little Miss coloring books. With my wonderful scented markers. I liked them all except black (which was scented black licorice). I think I also used to have Colorforms for these guys, too!

Seems like there is a resurgence in popularity for these items. They have a website and other folks are selling stuff with their characters, too.

Quote of the Day

If you were arrested for kindness, would there be enough evidence to convict you?

-Unknown

How to eat smaller portions

I've never been good at any form of dieting. To be honest, I don't really believe in dieting...you eat what you eat. If a diet is temporary instead of a permanent change to your way of eating, then any loss you may accomplish will most likely be lost when you resume your normal diet.

However, that being said, I'm trying to change how I eat. I need to add more green vegetables into my diet and I need to stop going back for seconds!

Today, I managed to eat the right amount of food at lunch. The trick? I measured out what I wanted to eat this morning (while I still had all sorts of noble ideas stuck in my sleep-riddled head) and took my lunch to work.

And ya know what? When you have no other food to go grab from the fridge...you stop eating. It's weird, but works. :)

But seriously, it was a relief to bring my own lunch to work, in the right portions, heavy with green veggies. I ate like a pig (always do), but in the end, hadn't sabotaged my inner self's desire to flatten, smooth and firm up particular body parts.

Of all the things to worry about!

I had a dream this week that I was with a man. The dream was going along and was good. That is, until I kissed him.

It was terrible. The kiss was a lot of bumping teeth and lips that didn't connect. It was terrible!

I actually woke the next morning wondering if that's what my next kiss would be like. If I weren't a little nervous about dating before (I was), then I would be after that dream!

What a strange thing to worry about, I think. I guess it's just another way that I'm worried that I am out of practice or somehow not good enough for the ideal man I'm chasing. I know that's silly, but I guess those little insecurities sometimes pop up.

Besides, Mr. Right will fit me just great. I know it!

Reading Like a Fiend

I started to think this morning about all the books I've read in the last 10-12 months. From what I can remember:

In Cold Blood, by Truman Capote
East of Eden, by John Steinbeck
To Kill a Mockingbird, by Harper Lee
The Time Traveler's Wife, by Audrey Niffenegger
Digital Fortress, by Dan Brown
Outlander, by Diana Gabaldon (re-reading this series)
Dragonfly in Amber, by Diana Gabaldon
Voyager, by Diana Gabaldon
Drums of Autumn, by Diana Gabaldon
The Fiery Cross, by Diana Gabaldon (in progress)

First day down!

So, I went in and did my first day at the gym. Sam showed me how to use the circuit training machines and I did a circuit. It was pretty quick and easy!

I learned that my arm muscles are much weaker than I thought! My legs did much, much better. Tomorrow I'm going to try an elliptical machine and do my calves & abs again.

I'm so glad to get over the first time, and to feel a little more comfortable there than when I first walked in. I'll have to try to remember to weigh myself tomorrow. Not that I'm trying to lose a bunch of weight or anything, but just that I'm curious. I don't own my own scale and so I usually only find out how much I weigh once a year at my annual physical.

It has been cold and rainy all day today! It is awesome. Considering that Monday it was about 90 plus degrees, and that today it has been in the 50s and 60s, it has been a bit of a shock. But a good one. We've had a lot of hot days this summer, so I'm really loving my first early taste of fall.

Exercise, here I come!

I signed up for a one week trial at a local gym. The trial week starts tomorrow.

I've been thinking about this for a while, but just hesitated about actually doing it. I'm not sure how other people feel, but I have a certain amount of fear associated with going to a gym and learning all the machines and being around other people who know what they're doing.

I'm not sure where this fear came from, but it's time for it to go! I have a goal of going to the gym at least 3 times in the next week, starting tomorrow. If I end up liking it, I will sign up for a monthly membership until I feel like I can make a 6 month commitment.

White Lasagna

White lasagna is one of those foods that I've always wanted to try making, but never have. Until now.

I have friends coming over for dinner tomorrow night and I was wracking my brain trying to figure out what to make. My friends are awesome, a really nice couple who are fun to hang out with. Their house is so cute and designed in a style that I love (it's like straight out of a Pottery Barn catalog). They have hosted the last few times we've gotten together.

They like food, but their tastes are pretty simple. When I thought back to the last few meals at their place, they included steak, steak, hamburgers and tacos. I started asking them about their likes and dislikes so I could figure out what to make.

Their dislikes between the two of them include eggplant, raw onions, citrus, mushrooms and raw tomatoes. And those are just the ones that my friend thought of when we were talking.

So, I'm trying to play it pretty safe because I want them to be happy with the food. But I also wanted to try making something new and different, partly for me and partly for them.

This white lasagna recipe includes chicken, spinach, mozzarella, Parmesan cheese, ricotta cheese and a white sauce made from butter, onions, garlic, milk, chicken broth, mozzarella cheese and Parmesan cheese.

The other thing I'm going to make is Caesar salad, with fresh dressing. We'll see how much anchovy I can sneak into the dressing without making it too fishy.

I'll post some pics of the finished products and report on whether or not they liked the food.

Survival Italian

That's the name of a book I've borrowed from my local library. It covers the basics, simple stuff you'd need to get by in Italy.

Which makes me wonder, is there a Survival Dating?

I actually asked my neighbor's 13-year-old daughter where to go to meet cute guys. She replied, "The mall?" So, I asked, well if I see a cute guy at the mall, how do I meet him? She said, "Drop your purse?"

Which, of course, reminded me of the "bend and snap" scene from Legally Blonde!

After doing some searching on Amazon, I realized that there are a ton of books out there that I might do good to read. Everything from, Why Men Marry Bitches to How to Be a Super Hot Woman to Stop Being the String Along: A Relationship Guide to Being THE ONE. There are Christian versions of dating books. There are books with commanding titles, such as The Rules.

As for me, I'm going to check out How to Be a Super Hot Woman. I'll let you know when the boys start banging down my door!

My Favorite Food Porn

I love beautiful pictures of food.

To imagine what flavor might flow forward upon consumption, what texture might surprise you. A picture leaves all the right things up to your imagination. What I imagine probably tastes better than the reality a lot of times!

My favorite place to spot food lately is someplace I stumbled upon, called TasteSpotting.

If you love seeing beautiful food and get inspired to cook based on photos (like me!), you should check it out.

Ahh, now I understand.

I've tried baking bread several times, with moderate success. I love my hardwood bowl and wooden mixing spoons. I have read the 10 Tips for Better Bread post that Farmgirl Fare posted in 2005. I would have assumed that I'd be a purist at heart, because of my love of the special, the artisinal, and the handmade.

Then, my friend gave me a bread machine.

I didn't know if it even worked, so my son and I tried it out yesterday. We used a recipe for French bread that came in the manual. I measured and dumped ingredients in. I pushed a button. And I walked away.

Three and a half hours later, the bread machine beeped three times and I had fresh bread.

My house smelled good and the bread had a good crunchy crust on it. I wasn't cooking tons of fresh bread by hand before, and now....I'm not sure when I'll do it again!

I'm on the hunt for recipes to use in the machine. I've found a few that I want to try so far.

Now I think I understand the appeal of bread machines.

Sausage Meatball Subs

When I was a teenager, I liked going to Subway occasionally to get a meatball sandwich. But sometime between then and now, I realized that the Subway sandwiches I thought were okay, really weren't that tasty.

Perhaps my palette became more refined...maybe their food got worse? I'd like to think that it's the former and not the latter.

So, I always figure that if you have a very specific taste memory in mind, you need to go recipe hunting. I was lucky enough not to have to look too far. I found this recipe on my favorite site for recipes, Allrecipes.

I recommend finding a sharp provolone for topping these...mozzarella doesn't seem to be strong enough to taste compared to the meatballs. Also, the bread is a very important factor. You'll need to find one that crusty enough to stand up to being gnawed on, but tasty enough to bring something to the party. Fresh baked is a MUST.

INGREDIENTS

• 1 pound Italian Sausage Roll
• 1/2 cup oatmeal
• 2 eggs
• 1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
• 1 (26 ounce) jar spaghetti sauce
• 6 hoagie buns (try a good baguette!)
  
• 6 tablespoons grated mozzarella cheese (I recommend sharp/aged provolone instead)
  

DIRECTIONS

1. In bowl, combine sausage, oatmeal, eggs and Parmesan cheese. Shape into 1 inch balls. In skillet over medium heat, cook meatballs until browned and cooked through. Reduce heat to low. Add spaghetti sauce and cook until sauce is hot. Spoon meatballs and sauce into buns and top with mozzarella cheese.

Meme to Revive the Nonblogger

Michelle over at The Accidental Scientist has been kind enough to keep me in mind. Even though I haven't blogged much this year (and very little of my blogging has been about food), Michelle reminds me of the connections I first made when I started blogging a few years ago.

This meme is a getting-to-know-you type, so here goes, for anyone who's interested in reading!

1. Last movie I saw in the theater?
Wall-E. It was different than I had expected, but enjoyable over all. The most notable thing about this movie was that something in it touched my son and made him sad. As we were walking out of the theater, up the little ramp, he started to cry. He wouldn't (or couldn't) explain it to me, but he did acknowledge that it was the movie. It was the first movie that's ever made him cry.

2. What book are you reading?
Well, last night I just finished reading Drums of Autumn by Diana Gabaldon. It's a book in a series and the whole series is wonderful. I'm also in the process of reading How Full is Your Bucket and Digital Fortress.

3. Favorite board game?
Hmmm. I like a few that I've tried in the last year, thanks to my sister. Circus Flohcati is fun. I also like Incan Gold.

4. Favorite magazine?
Wow. I don't think I could pick just one. I love a variety of food magazines, but my favorite probably changes...depending on who's got the most mouthwatering pics. Right after food magazines, my favorite is probably GQ. That's because I'm single, ladies. And if you still don't understand, go flip through a copy next time you're at the store. It's wonderful.

5. Favorite smells?
I agree with Michelle on one of my favorites...bread! Other favorites include sweet peas (flowers), citrus and the ocean air.

6. Favorite sounds?
My son's breath while he sleeps. Nothing much compares to that one.

7. Worst feeling in the world?
Not being able to help my son when he's gotten hurt.

8. First thing you think of when you wake?
What time is it?! Hurry, get up, close the shades and turn on the fan to bring in as much cool air as possible before the sun comes up and brings the heat!

9. Favorite fast food place?
Easy. In-N-Out.

10. Future child's name?
Not applicable. I stopped having kids when I reached perfection. His name is Evan. :)

11. Finish this statement: If I had a lot of money...
I would travel the world in style and then settle down to try my hand at a neighborhood restaurant. My goal would be to win an award for best local cheap eats.

12. Do you drive fast?
Gosh, I'm not sure. My current car doesn't really have the ability to drive fast! I'll let you know when I get a better car!

13. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?
Nope. That bed is mine, all mine. If only it weren't a twin!

14. Storms, cool or scary?
Cool. Love rain, thunder and lightning. As long as I'm not out in it!

15. What was your first car?
A 1980 Volkswagen Rabbit. I can remember one time when I went to open the little triangle window on the driver's side door and it fell out! Clank-clank-clank! on the street. I was so embarrassed (good thing it was late at night), but when I went back to get it, it hadn't even chipped. I got some metal to glass glue and fixed it.

16. Favorite drink?
Ok, I realize now that I'm terrible at picking out favorites. Especially when it deals with food. It all depends on the mood. I like a nice beer on a hot summer day. A glass of wine with a good meal. I need my one cup of coffee each morning (for ritual more than anything else). I love green tea in winter. Bloody mary's rock, too!

17. Finish this statement - "If I had time, I would.."
Finish school.

18. Do you eat the stems on broccoli?
Yes, that's the best part! I like the stems and stalks.

19. If you could dye your hair any other color, what would it be?
When I was younger I dyed my hair many different colors (what a blast), and it gave me the knowledge that, ultimately, I like my own hair color was so much better than what comes out of a bottle.

20. Name all the different cities in which you have lived.
Naples, Italy; San Francisco, CA; Jacksonville, FL; El Toro, CA; Ponte Vedra Beach, FL; Costa Mesa, CA; Tustin, CA; Scottsdale, AZ; Newport Beach, CA; Burbank, CA; Superior, CO (by the way, it was so distinctly NOT superior); Louisville, CO

21. Favorite sport to watch?
Basketball. Then tennis.

22. One nice thing about the person who sent this to you.
She has done one of the harder things that a friend needs to do, she keeps in touch and keeps reminding me of the folks and foods that are out there.

23. What's under your bed?
Moving boxes. Apparently, according to #20, I better be prepared to move, because you never know when I'll do it again!

24. Would you like to be born as yourself again?
I feel lucky in my life, but I would want to try a new adventure.

25. Morning person or night owl?
At this point in my life I'm probably not "better" at either one. I think that I enjoy my mornings now more than I have in the past, though.

26. Over easy or sunny side up?
The whites must be cooked all the way. Although I'd usually rather skip the eggs altogether.

27. Favorite place to relax?
Home. Although I'd rather change this one to "my vacation home in Tuscany!"

28. Favorite ice cream flavor?
I am not sure that I have one! But I do really like when you get mochi ice cream at sushi restaurants.

29. Of all the people you've tagged, who is most likely to respond first?
I've been out of blogging so long, I can't think of who I can tag!!

Because I know that she still blogs occasionally, I'll reach out to my sister Steph to do this meme. She loves food with the same kind of crazed enthusiasm as me. And I always know that I can trust her taste. She is always off on some kind of adventure, trying something new.

BTW, Steph, you should tag 4-5 bloggers (if you can!)...

Favorite New Toy: My Grill

I bought a grill two weekends ago. I found it on Craigslist and it was more money than I wanted to spend. However, it was a far superior grill than I ever thought I could buy.

It is a Vermont Castings grill, with a lovely dark blue enamel cover and lower portion, stainless steel all over, and enamel covered cast iron grates.

And I'm in love with it!

I always cooked on a charcoal grill before. The flavor and heat is wonderful with charcoal, but the time to prepare the coals and the mess they create can cause a little more work overall.

With propane, all you have to do is twist on the gas, turn on a burner and twist the starter. Voila! A fire is started.

Since I bought it 9 days ago, I have cooked cheeseburgers, chicken, steak, portobello mushrooms and zucchini. Tonight I'll use it to cook some pork chops.

I'm so in love with my new grill!!!

The Fastest Passport Ever

I applied for my passport Friday before last, on May 30th. Eight days later, on Saturday June 7th, I received my passport.

I didn't pay for expedited service, but apparently with travel prices the way they are, I'm the only one who's applying for a passport. It rocked!

When I put in my passport application, it sort of encompassed a lot of my dreams and hopes for my future. The guy at the post office asked me when I needed it by, and I told him that I had no plans for travel.

What I have is dreams of future travel, especially with that special someone. I have hopes for exploring and learning, and seeing and doing. And without that passport, I can't do so many of those things.

So, fate, I am now ready to meet that special someone. I welcome the love that the universe has to give me (god, I sound like I've been living near Boulder too long)...send him my way...preferably in a very nice package!

Good Dreams

Last night I was having such good dreams. I was getting what I wanted, or more precisely, I was about to get what I wanted.

In one of my dreams, I was taken to an indoor marketplace that housed multiple businesses. Inside there was an amazing Korean restaurant. The menu was amazingly extensive, and you could tell the food would be amazing.

In another of my dreams, I was talking to someone about college. They were commenting that they thought they could help me pay for college. Then they put me on the phone with another person who could also help me pay for college.

I rarely have good dreams, let alone awesome dreams about things like this. And since I've been watching BSG (I finished season 3 last night...it took all of 1 1/2 weeks to watch), I find myself wondering if visions really are possible. Or hoping that they are.

I guess I better keep my eyes open for these opportunities!

Motivation!

I think that I've just discovered the best motivation ever for getting my degree.

I hate being a secretary. Most of the time, people are very nice and don't look down on you, but I'm facing the most difficult thing right now, where I feel that my opinions are not valued and that I am being looked down upon. By my boss.

He doesn't go out of his way to be rude or anything like that. Normally we get along swimmingly well. But little things here and there remind me that a person in my job can expect to be disregarded from time to time from people like him.

I feel so pissed off right now, just frustrated really. But again, this is really the motivation that I need to make myself get the degree that I want. Just so that I can do something completely different and never have to be the low man on the totem pole.

Plus, it doesn't help that I'm always the lowest educated and employed person in almost all social groups I've been in since I moved to Colorado. It is a highly educated area and I feel it.

Ok, enough whining!

College

So, I'm having a little dilemma. I realized this week that I could take college classes and finish my college degree in the next three years (while I work) and even be able to afford it. The catch? It would be a degree in either Social Science, Sociology or Sociology/Criminology.

I have always figured that I'd study business. Not because I have a particular career path that I'm dying to follow. But just because I have a lot of experience in offices and figured it would be a natural, especially since I don't know what I want to do.

But, there are a few reasons I haven't returned to college yet. I work full time, and taking classes at my local college/university would take forever, because I could only really sign up for maybe 2 classes at a time because of work. I also have my son half of each week and studying when he's here will be more difficult, so my studying will be isolated either to late evenings or the half of the week I'm alone. The cost is another reason I've been hesitant. But, the university that I can do an "external degree" from would only cost me about $11K plus books to complete my the rest of my degree.

I think that is pretty good, considering it's the only option that I could start pursuing while my son is this young. I've also been waiting because I'd like to buy a home of my own first, and then save/spend on my education. If I end up doing that, it will take at least another year.

Ugh! I wish, I wish, I wish! But somehow the wishing doesn't help! I have to just start doing for myself and stop waiting. I guess that I should really pursue a Saturday job to bring in that little extra to save for a house.

The good thing is that I feel like I have a viable plan that I can go after now.

My Kid Cracks Me Up!

If you have kids, then you know the amazing comedy that can sometimes erupt spontaneously. If you don't have kids, there is no way to really explain what it's like. You'll just have to wait and see.

Tonight, while I was talking to my son and tucking him in bed, our conversation rambled from one topic to another. We started talking about vocabulary, and long words. I mentioned the word sphygmomanometer. If you're not familiar with the word, it is the blood pressure cuff that they use in your doctor's office.

So my son comments that a lot of those medical words are long. Like thermometer. Ther-mom-eater! Grrrr! Well, he explains, that's what it sounds like. Hi, I'm Ther, a mom eater!! He starts snapping at me. We're both laughing, it's a good one!

Nobody can make me laugh like my son.

Best Biscuits

I love this biscuit recipe. I am a little picky when it comes to biscuits, but this recipe is on my top ten homemade biscuits list. For a couple of reasons. They are simple to make. In about 10 minutes or less, you can be sliding these into the oven. They rise beautifully and have a flavor that is nice enough for both sausage patties or some nice jam.

I brush some butter on the top of these when they're just about done baking. Be careful not to over bake these, they'll be a little light on the top but more done on the bottom if your oven is like mine.

INGREDIENTS

* 2 cups all-purpose flour
* 1 tablespoon baking powder
* 1 teaspoon salt
* 1 tablespoon white sugar
* 1/3 cup shortening
* 1 cup milk

DIRECTIONS
1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F (220 degrees C).
2. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, salt, and sugar. Cut in the shortening until the mixture resembles coarse meal. Gradually stir in milk until dough pulls away from the side of the bowl.
3. Turn out onto a floured surface, and knead 15 to 20 times. Pat or roll dough out to 1 inch thick. Cut biscuits with a large cutter or juice glass dipped in flour. Repeat until all dough is used. Brush off the excess flour, and place biscuits onto an ungreased baking sheet.
4. Bake for 13 to 15 minutes in the preheated oven, or until edges begin to brown.

Bacon

This is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. If you love bacon like I do, check this out:

glumbert - Jim Gaffigan loves bacon

Blast from the past

A few months ago, I was at a friend's house for dinner and suddenly a song from a TV show popped into my head from out of nowhere. I couldn't quite remember what it was from, just that it went '3-2-1 Contact.'

Of course, with the internet being what it is today, I was able to find what I was looking for immediately. If you were a kid in the 80s, perhaps you'll remember this song, too.

Restaurant in the Sky

Someone sent me an email with all of these pics and asked if I would eat here...my answer? NO! Ok, more like hell NO.



This place hauls up a table and chairs (that swivel 180 degrees) by a crane and serves dinner. Go check out the other crazy photos at their website.

Eek!

Also, go check out Forbes' Most Unusual Restaurants in the World slide show. (click on the spot where it says "In Pictures.")

Cute Websites

I know that some people know about these websites, but just in case...

These are my 2 favorite cute websites to look at. Stuff On My Cat. The name says it all. And Cute Overload. Again, appropriate name! Go check them out. New stuff every day to make your day a little brighter.

Mini Food

I'm always like a big kid when it comes to mini stuff. I love huge food, too, anything that is good enough to get into the Guiness World Book of Records. But I've got a real soft spot in my heart for mini food.

This was something made by hercuteness over at craftster.org. Here is a link to her project.

It was inspired by an article in the Martha Stewart magazine. Of course, I think that the things that I frequently see in the Martha Stewart magazine are impossible to make at home (at least it won't look half as good!). So, it was nice to see these pics...the real thing.

Isn't is amazing?

2 Million Minutes

I found this on YouTube. I think that this would be a very interesting documentary to watch. It compares and contrasts American high school students to students in India and China.

Mio fratello ti chiama Giovanni.

I've been having fun lately listening to podcasts designed to teach you Italian at Learn Italian Pod.

They have a beginner's section, which is definitely where I am skill-wise, and the recordings are about 10 minutes long each (some are a little shorter). I go in and listen while I work, absorbing as much as I can and sometimes listening to the same recordings a few times.

I am trying to stretch this brain of mine! I've also found that it is fun to go to Italian food blogs and try to figure out what they are saying. And I've also found a good online dictionary to help with my interpretations.

Here are a few Italian food blogs (lots of transplants to Italy from other European countries it seems, I keep finding Italian food blogs where the owners are Swedes, Germans, etc.):

Un Tocco di Zenzero (A Touch of Ginger)
Il cavoletto di bruxelles
Cuoche dell'altro mondo (A Cook From Another World)

I find it very entertaining to see Italians cooking Asian food and how many other Italians reply with enthusiasm to those types of recipes.

Creamy Potato Soup

I tried this recipe from Recipezaar this weekend. I think that I should've boiled my potatoes a little bit longer, but overall the flavor was good. Next time, I'm going to add a sprig of fresh rosemary and some parsley for extra flavor.

What if...

What if you could take a big risk in your life, without the risk? What if I told you that you could try doing something that up until now you were afraid to do because of the possibility of failure but that it would be a success...guaranteed?

I guess that is the crux of risk, that there are no guarantees. But I think that it's an interesting way to free your mind to start really dreaming big, if only to see what your big dreams truly are.

If I could try something without the fear of failure...I think that I would change jobs and do something completely different from what I've been doing. Maybe interior design or criminal forensics. Something that holds the promise of excitement and new experiences.

I've always been drawn to color and shape, the joy of beauty for the sake of beauty. I also really thrive in cold, hard scientific facts. Things that can be relied upon, researched and referenced. Somewhere in this mix of art, criticism and detail is a joyous career awaiting to be discovered.

I think that a lot of problems in the world come from the paralysis that some of us suffer from. We get locked into our little lives, our little problems and forget how much of a difference our efforts can make. I was watching Extreme Makeover Home Edition last week and the family that was selected made an incredible difference in the lives of so many people in their community. They had 7 people living in a house that was less than 600 square feet. Yet, they made a difference to other people, even having so little. With no promise of reward, they contribute to others because that's what they believe in.

If I had nothing to fear, not only would I dream of living a great life for myself, I would also pursue a purpose driven life.

Recipe that I must try!

My sister blogged about picking up some yummy pepper shooters at a hoagie shop in Philadelphia. Pepper shooters are cherry peppers (hot) stuffed with a hunk of sharp provolone cheese wrapped in prosciutto. They also had salamancinis, which are pepperoncinis stuffed with a hunk of sharp provolone wrapped with salami.

Her boyfriend asked her to try to recreate the peppers at home. So, of course, my sister tried to meet the challenge and moved forward. Her shooters looked like this. However, she did say that they didn't turn out quite how they were at the store, so I started looking online for a recipe to try.

Here is what I found:

16 cherry peppers
1/3 pound grated provolone cheese
3 to 4 ounces prosciutto
Salt and white pepper to taste

For the marinade:
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
\ cup red wine vinegar (don't know what this measurement was supposed to be, so I figure just add to taste)
Juice of 1 lemon
1 teaspoon chopped fresh garlic
{ cup chopped fresh herbs (rosemary, basil, thyme, marjoram, oregano, etc.)

Whisk marinade ingredients together in a non-reactive bowl and set aside.

Remove the stems and cores (with seeds) from the peppers using a sharp paring knife. Quickly blanch if desired, and then dry the peppers well with paper towels. In a small bowl, mix the cheese and prosciutto with the salt and pepper. Carefully fill each pepper with the cheese mixture and place in jars or a shallow non-reactive casserole dish. Refrigerate.

Late New Year's Resolutions

I'm like many people. I resolve not to make resolutions each New Year's Day. I think that people should have an ongoing desire to improve themselves.

But regardless of what I say, I find that the beginning of a calendar year is a good time to look back and decide what needs to be changed as I move forward. Even without meaning to, I find that I give myself goals every year.

So what is it this year? Well, oddly enough, it's not too different than every year before this one.

(in no particular order)

1. Spend meaningful time with my son.
2. Get regular exercise, to improve my shape and feel better, stronger.
3. Eat better...same reasons as above.
4. Find happiness and joy in a relationship with a great guy.
5. Work in a fulfilling and rewarding job.
6. Save towards buying a "home" of my own.
7. Learn more Italian.

and last, but not least, and possibly the most important

8. Take more risks to get what I want out of life.

Back to School Lunch Box Ideas

I've been doing research on what to pack in my son's lunch box. Why? Up to this point, my husband had taken care of school lunches. But now, since we'll have two households, I don't think I can count on him to take care of that anymore!

I wanted to find fun, yummy and fairly healthy foods for my son. Things that I'd pack myself for lunch. Since I've been to a ton of different websites and compiled a list for my own convenience, I thought I'd share the ideas with others.

Main Dishes

1. Sandwiches - PB&J, PB&Banana with Honey, Various meats & cheeses, egg salad, chicken salad. Liven up the sandwiches by using pita bread, mini bagels, tortillas, English muffins, dinner rolls, regular sized bagels with cream cheese, or use cookie cutters to make sandwiches into neat shapes
   
2. Macaroni & cheese (try to slip in some steamed broccoli or another veggie they'd like)
3. Potstickers with dipping sauce on the side
4. Cold tofu with a soy, sesame oil and green onion dipping sauce (serve w/edamame)
   
5. Cold noodle salads (sesame noodles with chicken)
6. Pig in a blanket (a hot dog baked in a crescent roll/biscuit coating)
7. Hot soup in a thermos
8. Cubed cheeses with cubed ham, crackers, olives, pickles, and artichoke hearts (think: party tray)
   
9. Try chicken salad in an apple "cup" - cut the top 1/3 of the apple off and removed interior flesh, fill with chicken salad and replace the top

Side Dishes

1. Carrot sticks and other veggies with ranch dip in a container
2. Low-fat crisps/chips (smaller snack size bags)
3. Rice cakes or oat cakes
4. Baked pita chips (easy to do at home, using pita bread)
   
5. Pasta salad
   
6. Potato salad
7. Rice pudding
8. Banana or zucchini bread, also try carrot pineapple muffins
9. Dried fruit (apricots, raisins, etc.)
10. Fruit salad, fruit cocktail (remember to buy those with light syrup or juice)
    
11. Fresh fruit (apples, bananas, citrus, pears, pineapple, melon, cherries, grapes, peaches, nectarines, kiwi, mangoes, blueberries, strawberries, raspberries)...make fruit more interesting by placing it on bamboo skewers
    
12. Granola / trail mix (Wild Oats' website has recipe for trail mix)
13. Applesauce cup
14. Olives / pickles
15. String cheese
16. Yogurt
17. Reduced fat, hard cheese
    

Drinks

1. Water
2. Water with a Country Time lemonade pack mixed in (low sugar and it's real sugar, not HFCS)
3. Sparkling water flavored with fruit
4. 1% milk (regular or chocolate)
5. Juice box (check to make sure it's 100% juice...freeze the juice box and it'll thaw by lunch)

General Tips

1. Use low-fat cheese on sandwiches. Though cheese provides calcium, it's the second leading source of artery-clogging saturated fat in kids' diets.
2. Switch from ham, bologna, salami, pastrami or corned beef to low-fat alternatives. You can still buy the ham and bologna...just look for a lower-fat, lower-sodium variety.
3. Include at least one serving of fruit in each lunch.
4. Use whole grain breads instead of white breads (beware of 'enriched flour'...it means it was ground so fine that it lost all it's nutrients and they've been added back in; however, your body doesn't absorb the added nutrients the same way it would in their natural forms).
5. Limit cookies, snack cakes, doughnuts, brownies, and other sweet baked goods. These are big sources of saturated fats.
6. Pack baked snacks instead of fried snacks - even if they use Olean (it can cause cramping & diarrhea...cha cha cha).
7. If you send juice, use 100% juice.
8. Avoid Lunchables.
   

If you have any ideas to add to mine, leave me a comment...I can certainly use any good suggestions! Also, if you haven't checked it out, Google 'laptop lunches' to see the American version of the Japanese bento box.

So, what would you do?

I have been hurriedly searching for a place to live the last few weeks. I've been searching online, in newspapers, and by word of mouth. And after about a month, I don't really have much to show for my efforts.

My problem? Well, it's a few things.

First, I have a small budget that I'd like to stick to, simply because I don't feel like throwing away most of my paycheck each month to someplace that isn't going to give me much return in the way of a long term investment.

Second, I will have a 7 year old boy half of each week and that cramps some folks' style.

Last, I have certain standards that I won't compromise on. I won't live with a creepy 45 year old man who's interested in the fact that I'll be recently divorced. I won't live with partying 21 year old kids. Or people who have older kids that may prematurely educate my son about some of the more delicate intricacies of the relationships between men and women.

So, right now, I feel that I'm faced with two choices.

The first...dum - dum - dummm - is a mobile home in a small trailer park not too far from here. Or as my friend Ben would call it, "wheel estate." I would have one small room to myself, the living room and a small kitchen. The owners keep the other room and are in town about 3-4 weeks per year. Otherwise, it's all mine. Yup. And, in case you're wondering, the trailer park is just like you'd imagine a trailer park being. Inexpensive cars...lots of them...The only other thing is I am not sure if trailers get more bugs than regular apartments...I hate spiders...or if they're more/less expensive in regards to utilities. It's also an older place, but has new carpet and paint. And a swamp cooler. That's right, no A/C.

The second is a room and shared living space in an apartment just across from mine. The benefits of this place is that it's really close to my son's school. I'd be in a regular apartment, so I know what to expect, and I'd still live close to my neighbors that I'm friends with. Very close. But I would also have company. I guess that can be good or bad, depending on how well we get along long-term. Also, my current place also has an exercise room. The bad part, I'd be sharing with a 24 year old bachelor. But, he's the geeky, non-partying type...so maybe?

Each would probably cost about the same.

So, what would you do?

Got a job!

Since I'm not starting until the 20th, I'm not going to say too much about it except that I'm really happy!

I think that the people are going to be great to work with and that it will be a fun place to work. I feel like my coworkers will be very supportive of me and allow me to grow.

Yay!

Flowers from a friend

flowers

Crazy Week, Anyone?

When Monday rolled around, I thought that it was just me. I was feeling a little down in the dumps but figured that it was the result of a few small things that were bothering me. Nothing important, but just made me feel "blah."

So, I thought, I need to call a friend and get cheered up by hearing about someone else's good week. So far, this is what my friends have been going through this week.

1. One friend has mono, stress at work, stress with friends and stress from their ex.

2. One friend got a flat tire on Tuesday and was laid off on Wednesday. They also still haven't found a new place to live and their lease expires tomorrow.

3. Another friend was feeling so blue that she left work early. Twice. One day, she left at 12:30pm. (Oh the lucky ones who get to work at a family business!)

4. The first friend I'd called had been dumped at 6am that morning. I called them at 8:30am. No chance they were going to cheer me up.

5. A family member moved from one state to another and a bunch of her stuff was broken due to poor packaging by the friend she'd hired.

6. My poor son got scratched in a freak cat-accident at a neighbor's house.

7. My poor, poor son got debris in his eye while playing with sticks and stuff outside and had to undergo the terrible treatment of an eye washing by evil Nurse Mom.

Whew, am I ready for Friday!

Guess what I learned to do?

I learned to change the oil in my car! Yay!

I know that it seems silly that I should be so excited about changing my oil (and believe me, I was SO excited), but it was an accomplishment to me.

I think that every girl should know how to change their own oil in their car. Thank goodness for my neighbor Ben, who showed me how and made sure to emphasize what I should and should not do. Basically, it's pretty easy as long as you remember those things.

I've also learned (but I'm still practicing) how to whistle when you put two fingers in your mouth. Another of my neighbors, Christine, taught me how to do that. And every time I successfully whistle, I start laughing like mad. I can't help it, I'm just SO tickled to be able to do something that I didn't think that I'd ever be able to do.

Drew Carey Career Aptitiude Test

Just for kicks, I completed the online Drew Carey Career Aptitude test. Here are my results.

How to Raise Intelligent, Healthy, Happy Kids

Doesn't that sound like the handbook you should've been handed when your child was born?

Instead of having one essential manual to raising children, there are about 100,000 "authorities" on the subject, including our parents, siblings, friends and even complete strangers.

Your boss knows just the trick to make your child sleep through the night (and NO, it didn't work). Your mother-in-law is sure that you're breastfeeding your child too often. And, by the way, won't that rot their teeth? And while we're talking about health, your own mother thinks that the baby is overweight and that it's a permanent condition.

Child-rearing is one of the most individual experiences I've ever known. While certain books were helpful (What to Expect When You're Expecting), many were either overkill or simply wrong. And good intentions aside, I almost felt like everyone's suggestions were somehow compensation for not doing something right when they raised their own kids (who are often times akin to demon-spawn).

So all that being said, here are the few things that I think may apply to everyone:

1. Time goes faster than you think. I know that sounds simple. But the faster you can start relishing every day, week and month instead of looking forward to the next part in your child's life, the better. I wish the last eight years had gone slower. I hope that time slows down even now.

2. Good manners are a must. Start coaching before he can speak. And keep reinforcing all during his youth. Otherwise, he will annoy his teachers, friends and friends' parents. It's MUCH harder to learn good manners when you're older, help him out by starting now.

3. Nutrition will affect how he learns. Have a good, balanced diet including plenty of vegetables. Sneak them in casseroles if you have to, and try your best to help your child experiment with food more. Again, it's a life-long habit.

4. Don't try to be a best friend. Be a Parent. They'll have lots of other friends, but only two parents. Kids need discipline (I said 'discipline', not 'punishment'), and it makes their lives easier to know what's expected of them. Kids whose parents are lax on discipline have a difficult time at school and making friends.

5. Spend quality time with your kids. This does NOT include watching TV. The most important part of quality time is talking and really listening. Most of the time when my son goes into another long-winded story about some new Storm Trooper ship he's created my mind immediately wants to wander. But, it's important to him, ergo, it's important to me.

6. Don't let him chicken out of experiences when it's safe. My son tries to convince me to let him skip his swim lessons. I can't blame him for trying. :) But I know that it's safe and that it's just the fear of the water that makes him hate it. But ultimately, he's way better off if I stick to my guns and insist he try it. He was also trying to refuse taking his training wheels off his bike. That was about 1 week ago. He rides his bike with more comfort than me now! Sans training wheels.

Well, that's about all I know. Good luck to anyone raising their own.

Trail in Boulder

Beautiful, isn't it?

2nd Grade Already!!

That's right.

I'm the proud mother of a child headed into second grade this fall. Eek!

When we were young kids, most of us wished to be older. Now, of course, most of us wish we could be younger!

But mostly, now I just wish to be aware enough to enjoy each moment with my son...because lord knows that I haven't figured out the secret to slowing down time.

This year has flown by. I was lucky enough to be at home with my son this year, so I got to meet and interact with all of the children and parents from his class. It was an awesome experience.

I've met people from Finland, Burma, England, New Orleans, Cascadia (California), along with a few locals as well. And they pretty much were friendly, nice people no matter where they were from.

We went shopping together, went for coffee together, had birthday parties together, shared food and recipes, went for walks and hikes together, and volunteered at many school events.

I think that I'll really miss being at home now that I've had such an amazing year with these wonderful people.

Dating after marriage

What a strange new territory. I never really thought about dating again until recently. After going to court and turning in the proper paperwork to get my divorce moving, it starts to seem more like a real possibility.

The problem? The last time I dated, I thought this: dating sucks.

Sure, it's fun, having those first excited feelings when you meet someone new, but after a few go-rounds with some...*a-hem*...losers, the appeal of dating now seems even less thrilling than when I was younger and could still qualify as somebody's "trophy wife."

These days, I'm nobody's "trophy" (of course referring strictly to looks). I'm a mom and I'm almost 30. And, I look about right for those circumstances, perhaps better than some. But it's not my looks (or theirs) that concerns me.

I think about how long it really takes to get to know someone. And to trust them. I have a difficult enough time just making good friends, let alone trying to find someone good enough to share my life and my bed with.

I guess I can try to forget about dating and focus on trying to fulfill all of my dreams for myself. And maybe if Mr. Right happens along at the right moment, I'll notice him. In the meanwhile, I think I need to make sure to avoid all the Mr. Wrongs that apparently think that physical attraction is the main basis for all good relationships.

Annoyed.

Okay, since I'm going through a divorce, there are many things that I get annoyed at, as you might imagine.

I get annoyed at the thought of all the stuff that's been bothering me for years, the things that led me to get divorced and the fact that my husband still doesn't get it. He doesn't understand that while trust issues are at the heart of many of our problems, the other "little things" are probably worse.

How would you feel if:

You were sick enough to call in to work and stay home, but your spouse didn't ask you how you felt, if you wanted a drink or some medicine from the store, or left your child at home for you to care for them while you're sleeping...because you're SICK?!

You agree to become the partner that works while your spouse stays at home to raise the child for a while...and they promise that they'll do this job well (you explain that they need to do all the stuff you do) and then, they never dust, vacuum once every couple of weeks, usually didn't make dinner and also didn't bother doing a good job folding your laundry. Not to mention that they took plenty of time to go have coffee with friends at the Starbucks all the time.

Whenever your family or friends came over, all of sudden your spouse becomes Mr. Congeniality. Offering to get everyone drinks, food, being in general charming, friendly and smiling, while during the rest of your life, he's nothing like that.

Green tea as a diet aid?

I like to drink green tea, but I usually don't drink it in large quantities. But after reading a post on Craigslist, I decided to try out consuming more to see if I "got the burn!"

So, I drank one more very large cup than I usually would (probably around 5-6 cups total) and I can't believe how hot I got! It woke me up last night and I had to open my sliding door for air.

Also, this morning, I started with one cup of green tea and it warmed me up so much I was the only parent dropping my kid off at school who wasn't cold.

I was guessing that it must have increased my metabolism, but I wanted to know more after experiencing such immediate results. So, I googled green tea and weight loss and found this article...it was a study done by the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition.
http://www.ajcn.org/cgi/content/abstract/70/6/1040

It showed that green tea consumption (not just caffeine, but green tea) increased the body's natural energy expenditure during the day and promotes fat oxidation.

Awesome!

So, I'm going to keep it up and see how much of a difference I see in the next few weeks.

Gotta shed a few pounds

I've decided that I need to get back into the swing of things and lose a few pounds. Or, more specifically, inches.

I'd like to trim my tummy down and lose a little overall so that my arms, thighs, butt is slimmer in general.

So, I've been reading different things about how to lose weight. Of course, there are as many diets out there as there are dieters, so it's a hard thing to figure out exactly what to do. I've decided, that in addition to bicycling 3x week, I need to start walking on the other days, at least 30 minutes of hard walking. I also want to start some tummy exercises, but I find the ones I've tried too challenging for a beginner, so I'm going to try some dance-exercise stuff to strengthen up before trying the harder stuff.

But the hardest part will be the diet. I know that I should be eating loads of fruits and veggies...but when I'm choosing between an extra helping of broccoli and another serving of pasta with cheese, broccoli loses! I think that I need to find more exciting ways to prepare fruits and veggies. I also need to find more ways to make them convenient, so that it's easier to eat a banana than reheat my rich chicken leftovers from the night before.

I also need to start incorporating some of those key snacking staples...nuts, water, green tea, high fiber granola, peanut butter, cheese, etc., in healthy portions.

I should weigh/measure myself now and track my loss. Maybe that's what I'll do today!

What makes a good job?

I've heard people say that you should work doing something that you would do even if you weren't getting paid.

Since there are few jobs that pay you to eat or shop, and even fewer that pay well, I've decided that the above advice is nice in theory but may lack in feasibility.

When you decide to look for your next job, what are the criteria that come to mind? How does one determine whether a job is good, bad or simply mediocre? Of course, this is all subjective, so everyone's answer will be different.

Money
Like it or not, money is essential if you don't have a trust fund from a rich dead uncle. But obviously, money is not important enough to override things like a bad working environment or inability to advance.

People
Your boss, coworkers, and customers will probably be a huge make-or-break point at your new job. The only way to avoid working with jerks altogether is to take a position as an enbalmist...and no, I'm not interested!

Location
I hate commuting. You may love it. That could make the same job a dream job or a nightmare, depending on who's interested.

Perks
A casual dress code is a dream of mine. It makes me feel elated. Lunch on the boss/office is nice too. But jeans....oooh, I'd be in heaven. Time off to take care of personal things as necessary is also a must-have.

Room to Advance
Unless you've found the "it" job, chances are good that you'd like the ability to move up or learn a different position. I've interviewed for great jobs that had no possibility of advancement. They're also known as 'dead-end jobs.'

Appreciation
There's no substitute to having an appreciative boss and coworkers. And it's even worse if other bosses do a good job at recognizing excellence in their subordinates and your boss doesn't. You'd think that they'd teach all bosses this at boss school, but unfortunately, some of the best supervisors fall short of being great because of this.

As soon as I find my dream job at the end of summer, I'll let you know!

Today is the first day of the rest of your life...

So. If you had the chance to take back control of your life, what would you do? If you could start pursuing your own interests without having them conflict with a partner or spouse...would you start to dream bigger dreams?

Since I'm going to be divorced this year, I've started to think about what I want.

And I realized, it has been a very long time since I've thought about what I want.

Travel. Financial security. Simple furnishings in a simple home. Food...different kinds at home than I've been able to make before and trying new stuff at new restaurants. Maybe new love (but definitely on my own terms).

But mostly, I think I'd like the first four.

If you got to start dreaming anew, what would you dream of?

April 20, 2007

Today was an uneventful, yet busy, day.

My son was off from school for a professional development day, so we planned on goofing off.

We started our morning with cinnamon sugar cake doughnuts at the Marketplace Bakery. A couple of my old people were there and we enjoyed stories of camping in the snow as youngsters and some bridge talk. When I say bridge, I mean the type that goes over the water or a chasm. I never knew it but there are some that cantilever to the sides versus drawing up to allow passing boats by.

After some playing back at home, we headed over to the Jamba Juice and redeemed a coupon they'd mailed to us. We enjoyed a pomegranate smoothie and then checked out the bocce ball sets at the Sports Authority. I thought one set might be okay, but it cost $79.99, and I thought, hell, I better be sure it's okay! So we went over to Dick's at the mall and looked at their sets. They had a nice resin set but the case was busted on the bottom. And for $79.99, regardless of the 10% discount, that was no deal. Bocce balls weigh a ton and you must have a carrying case.

On the way back home, we stopped at the Target and found a nice compromise. An inexpensive set that was slightly smaller and had a simple carrying case. Since we're completely new to the sport, the $27.00 sale price was perfect.

By 5:00pm, we were in the park at the bocce courts. The weather stayed slightly warm and we played without jackets, enjoying the simple thrills that the game offered.

Dinner at home was a new recipe: basil cream chicken. It was dee-lish!

Looking forward to a relaxing weekend. I hope, I hope!

An Old Friend

My good friend that I think of often.

Mikko Robert Keskinen Davies

My "Old People"

I moved to Colorado last summer. I didn't really know too much about the area, but thanks in large part to the friendly locals, we've been learning more and more.

Once, on a visit to a local bakery in our small old town area, I joined a group of older folks sitting at a lone table in the hall. I was welcome to join them, and have been ever since. Most of them grew up here and have been sharing the most amusing stories with me. After I visit with them, I find my mind wandering to what new stories they told me.

This is the best way to get history, if you can. Straight from the mouths of the elderly themselves who lived it as teenagers.

Some of the most amusing stories are those that tell of medicinal remedies long gone (thank goodness!). Others tell of life as teenagers in small towns and all the trouble they got in. They all remember who the town doctor was and who the sheriff was. They can tell you who owned the local homes that are now being renovated by eager new purchasers. They can tell you that the real estate office down the street used to be the mortuary. And they can tell you stories about the folks that now grace the pages of the newspaper obituary section.

If you haven't met your local old people, hurry up, before they're just an entry in the newspaper and their history is lost.

Ammonia, Bleach and Baking Soda. Oh My!

I feel like I've been breathing bleach, ammonia and baking soda for the last few days! I've been helping a friend move and clean her apartments for four of the last five days. Whew! It makes you want to never move again! Or clean again, for that matter.

Unfortunately, that won't be the case for us! We feel like it's only a matter of time before our new management at our apartments discovers that we are paying month-to-month and tries to stick us with a new lease...at $250 more a month! That's what we've been hearing from our neighbors, so we are bracing ourselves for a move in our not-too-distant future.

We are also anticipating some other large changes in our personal lives, namely that my husband and I have decided to get divorced.

It's for a lot of reasons. And it's something that we've been building towards practically from the start of our relationship. I think that the biggest thing is that I got married too young. I didn't really know who I was and by the time I knew, I realized that I had a lot of issues with my husband. He's a good person and a good father, so I don't want anyone to think that he's a bad guy. We just didn't end up being a good fit, is all.

It's been a little rough trying to figure out what to do and when in the whole divorce process, but I think that so far it's going ok.

And I'm looking forward to living alone for the first time in my life. Well, except for when my son is with me and of course, I'll have a cat. So, somewhat alone, but still it will be a big change.

So, I think it will be a good change ultimately. So no need to tell me you're sorry for me. (Which, I don't think that people can help!) Caryl, nice to hear from you again, what's new in your neck of the woods?